Life really is indescribable. When I think about all I learn, and go through. The ups and downs, and inbetweens. Feelings, moods. Smiles and heartaches. It all puts me in awe, and I sometimes wonder why it all is the way it is. Thats where I have to just trust God and that He really knows what He's doing. I seem to always end up saying "man o man I hope you know what your up to." Cause I sure don't know what the heck I'm doing. I find more each day that I cannot escape growing up. It happens. I can still stay a kid, but the maturing that is necessary must happen and I must faces the cold raw sometimes unwanted facts of life! I must try I will fall, I must learn and grow. It is going to happen whether I am ready or not. The important part is that everytime I fall, trip or stumble I get back up and keep pushing on with God. I must never put myself before Him, it does not work! I know. I can't forget that He the most wonderful creator gave me this life, so I must give it back to Him and do as He asks. I sadly feel as if my spark of passion for God has dimmed and the deepest love faded a bit in the past couple months. I have dwittled amongst the world and its faulty temporary past pleasures. That only end up leaving a bitter taste and empty awkward feeling with me and then I come to and re-realize that God will always be the only one that gives me life, and pleasure that does not fail to succeed. I really have come to understand and embrace in the strangest ways that I am nothing without God, and neither are you! I don't understand why this ticks people off and offends them, It is undoubtedly one of the most beautiful things to know we are nothing with out Him, maybe people should drop the pride and come to the same realization. The best part is finding what we are and can be through Him, aw at least the beauty that comes from being a child of the King!
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