wow everything all at once?

I don't even know why I'm blogging, Its dumb and chances are no one reads this thing anyway. Its just to get it out, gahhhh I get so annoyed so fast. I fail, I don't spend enough one on one time, or tent time with Jesus, I fail at being a good daughter, I fail at being good enough for my friends some how I suck at life, or thats how they show the story.., I fail at being specific enough, I fail at being godly, i fail at being worldy, ugh seriously i fail at getting a job though im waiting for further plans from God but noo does that stop everyone from saying "if your ever gonna get anywhere your going to have to sacrifice a little chruch.." ahhh drop it and bud out, i know what im doing, ahhah i dont actually but i have a Father who does know what he's doing, God has control its all good, Im fed up, there failure! ugh, yes i know, im not really a failure so don't send me a message saying, " you know your not a failure" im simply venting, and trying to explain how i currently feel. I dropped out, and we all make mistakes, no mines not bigger then yours! there all equal! Im so completely upset with the way everythings going, ps. dont get me wrong im a happy person, God is still my joy but right now im not content or happy. ok? ok. well one this is for sure I looooooove Jesus with all my heart, I melt at the mention of His most awesome holy name, and my mom I love her! shes soooooo not the mom i want, nor anything i really want, yeah thats harsh but she loves me and i love her, we fight so much you'd never know and we suck at life, we mess up so much, we never talk or see eachother but its true love in a poor broken condition, i love my mommy! :) sooo much shes good at making me smile...
and im soo thankful for kimberly and warren no joke, i cant even tell you, common their too amazing, they help me keep it together!! my mom and dad that arnt really mine...but awesome ppl :D i love my youth pastors! tooooooo much, :D :D :)