8/12/11- I'm starting to enjoy Iowa more and more.

Well on Wednesday the 10th Matthew and I got back from North Dakota. It was a blast, had a great trip. Dad and all the family really like Matthew, which makes me extremely happy. I already knew how to drive standard, but I wasn't really confident in it or the best, so Matt taught me how. Haha, it was stressful for me and I made it stressful for him. Teehee, oops! But soon I was getting very pro at it, well on level ground anyways. So on the trip home, back to Iowa I got to drive, until we got to Minot.. which is where we encountered an accident on a hill, so Matthew just had me pull onto another street and we swapped spots. I guess it wasn't ideal driving for a first timer, and I'll admit I was upset because I felt that I was ready, and I really wanted to deal with it, but I'm okay with getting more practice in first. I think I just may get a standard when I get another vehicle. I am finally starting to socialize more and more. I am just not the best at making new friends, people are picky and I don't know what to say all the time, which just makes me shy and awkward, and then I get nervous. Boo! But I am making a lot of progress, I think I'm getting more and more comfortable with who I am, and learning more about who I am and who God wants and is trying to transform me to be. :) I had such an incredible time at the state fair tonight! I went to see Casting Crowns and Sanctus Real! They are two of my most favorite bands ever. I loved the concert so much, and they did these super incredible, astonishing fireworks afterwards. It blew me away, I was in such awe and wonder. I am posting the video of them on fb sometime soon! I tried.. wait for it, waaaaait for it, FRIED OREOS! It was different, I guess it was just too much for my stomach though, too sweet and the fried stuff always upsets my tummy without fail. I rather eat a home grown carrot, now that is yummy goodness. I parked pretty far away too, so it was nice walking to and from the fair. I really enjoyed my walk at night back to my car, it was refreshing and relaxing. I had a wonderful night, God was all over my heart like no other! I really became desperate for all of Him, for what all of me; every inch of my body, every corner of my soul and every depth of my heart was longing, aching for, HIM! It was good, real good. I think it hit me hard, God just slammed open my heart and eyes when Mark Hall, the lead of Casting Crowns was speaking in between songs. Long story short, it lit the fire again, the fire that has been strangely dim for the last few months. I finally acquired the break through that I have been aching for, literally it seems. You know we always say, "Oh, what I would do to have the kind of faith it takes to climb out of this boat I'm in onto the crashing waves, to step out of my comfort zone into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is, and He's holding out His hand. Oh what I would do to have the kind of strength it takes to stand before a giant, with just a sling and a stone, surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors shaking in their armor, wishing they'd have had the strength to stand." Yet we don't realize that we say, "Oh what I WOULD DO, to have.." it's like saying we would do anything to have that faith, to have that strength, when Christ is saying, "HELLO, YOU CAN! YOU CAN! IT'S RIGHT HERE, NOW DO WHAT IT TAKES TO GET IT! YOU CAN DO IT THROUGH ME, WITH ME, I'M ALL YOU NEED TO ABTAIN IT." I know, I just really realized that tonight. Why don't I actually put all I have into it, instead of half heartedly making attempt? Well, from now on, I'm going to do what the, oh what I would do, and actually get those things! God did not create me to sit back, to fear and fret, to stand in the way. I was created for so much more! and it's time I start doing something about it, to start living and I mean really living this way. I have a heaping pile of things to work on, and I know, I know, it will forever be a journey, but it's past due for me to start putting more legit effort into these things. Random thought, I am so happy that we shampooed the carpets, they look so much better then before. My relationship with Matthew teaches me something new everyday, I learn so much wisdom and life lessons from God through this, it amazes me. I am ever grateful and thankful without end for the chance to share experiences, tidbits and ends, memories and life, growing in Christ and pouring into each other, lending a helping hand and heart, uplifting, encouraging, showing each other what God's truth really is and means, learning, filling each other with scripture and goals, for the chance to do all that and much, much more! I am quite excited to go to ladies night tomorrow, dinner at Olive Garden. Good food (I hear, never have been there.), good people and God at our center, sounds like a recipe to an awesome evening! And I'm also profoundly excited to go to the fair on Sunday with Matthew!! We are seeing Tenth Avenue North that night! Yay! I absolutely, positively love them! So full of God! Well with all that said, I have some cleaning that needs to be tended to, and some picking up to do. So I should be getting off my laptop and getting my butt to work. I will be blogging more tomorrow, well that's the plan any who.